(EN) I am intelligent (Rukozhop)

(EN) I am intelligent (Rukozhop)

(Incoherent muttering)

I am extremely smart, intelligent, and clever!
I am a freakin' famous guy
All over freakin' world!
But my Russian girlfriend calls me stupid, ever,
Because I cannot hammer
A nail into the wall!

She calls me "rukozhop", it sounds so offensive!
It means my hands grow out of my ass
(What a stress!)
My Russian love! Don't treat me hard, stop being so aggressive,
I'm not "muzhik", you're right, I'm not so handy blessed!
(He's not so blessed!)

I've got a PhD in physics and biology,
I am consulting NASA,
Amazon and Musk!
Why don't you understand I'm struggling for ecology,
And these domestic skills
Are out of my task!

I'm pacifist! I fight for peace; I vote against the war!
While you are calling me the "useless man!"
(Useless man!!!)
So damn your freakin' hammer, freakin' nails and freakin' wall!
Get off my house! I'll find
A girlfriend from Thailand!

Yes! Yes! Yes!
A silent and submissive girl from overseas Thailand!
A silent and submissive girl from overseas Thailand!
A silent and submissive girl from overseas Thailand!
A silent and submissive girl from overseas Thailand!

(c)VonRaven, 2026.